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Anders Umholtz, Staff Writer

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These days, it seems like all you hear in the news is either “Donald Trump is a genius! He’s the greatest president in human history!” or “Look at this crazy thing Drumpf tweeted! We’re gonna cover every single half-baked comment he makes even though we’re a left-biased news agency and excessive media coverage is pretty much the only reason he’s sitting in the Oval Office right now. But our ratings have never been higher!” It’s exhausting. The President signed 96 laws in 2017 alone, but I didn’t hear about a single one of them in the news. You’re in luck, though. Here are some of the most significant laws Trump has passed so far, explained in excruciating detail:

Firstly, there’s some stuff the president always signs: H.R. 2810 set the budget for the Department of Defense, including an increase to general defense funding, support for the Afghan and Ukrainian militaries, as well as rebels in Syria. Also notable is a bill that prevents detainees at Guantanamo Bay from being transferred to the U.S., and the establishment of the United States Space Corps and the United States Space Command (a.k.a “Space Force”). H.R. 244: Consolidated Appropriations Act handled more boring funding stuff that happens every year, with the addition of legislation that encourages employers to hire veterans.

Now we can get to the fun stuff. H.R. 83 made it so employers no longer have to keep a record of work-related illnesses or injuries. You’ve probably heard a thing or two about Net Neutrality, which S.J. Res. 34 relates to. This bill allows internet service providers (ISPs) like Comcast, Verizon, and AT&T to view and sell their clients’ search history and other data. Sponsor Jeff Flake (AZ) criticized the previous laws which kept more information private: “…information generated from looking up the latest Cardinals score or checking the weather in Scottsdale is treated the same as personal health and financial data.” On the other side, many believe this bill compromised user privacy too much, and any economic gain would only be felt by ISPs.

Trump also passed some less controversial legislation, like several laws designed to combat human trafficking. And with the recent bombardment of hurricanes the U.S. suffered from there were a slew of laws related to disaster relief, like H.R.3823, which modified IRS code for individuals and businesses affected by the hurricanes. H.R. 3732 increased the amount of funding available to U.S. citizens living abroad who got hit. The Senate unanimously approved H.R. 3218, referred to as the “Forever G.I. Bill” which made it easier for veterans to use educational benefits and find schools with priority enrollment for vets.

Many of these laws will be hugely influential in America. But the President has caught a lot of flak for the large portion of his laws that serve only to repeal Obama-era legislation. H.J.Res. 43 voided rules that prevented states from keeping federal funds from pro-choice/pro-abortion groups like Planned Parenthood. The law was initially opposed by two Republicans in the Senate, causing a tie which was broken by V.P. Mike Pence.

Trump’s revised tax system was big in the news for a while. CNN called it “The most sweeping overhaul of the US tax system in more than 30 years.” The law mostly consisted of reductions to taxes on individuals, with the highest income bracket dropping from 39.6% to 37% and the corporate tax going from 35% to 27%. Some praised the change for its benefit to businesses, while others criticized it for not doing enough to benefit the middle class.

Whether you land on the left, the right, up, or down, you know that it’s a crazy time out there! But if you ever get worried about the future, you can at least take solace in knowing that the Space Force is up there protecting the night sky and President Trump is in the Oval Office protecting our veterans, providing aid to disaster survivors, and handing off your private information to Comcast. Stay American, America!

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Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes